Today has been unforgettable for 2 reasons.

First, I woke up to HUNDREDS of twitter notifications. I was praying that maybe it was related to my game publication submission. No. I was being cyber bullied by a bunch of douche bag racists who made burner accounts. They were attacking me because I wrote to another designer that was boycotting Steam, for their silence during this massive BLM movement. I was caught in the crossfire, and it led to people digging up information about my games.
Man, it was bad.

I was told that my games were 8 bit trash, indie trash, that only 2 people would play them, that no one would care, that I should quit, that I was going to always be poor.
I’ll spare the racists comments.

I blocked people for about an hour, took a breath, and rushed to my itch(dot)io page, to make sure that wasn’t tarnished.
I was fine.
I tried cooling down from this and prepped for what was most important today.
I got to do a presentation to a bunch of middle-school aged kids in South LA, all hoping to be game designers one day. Being someone from South LA that has clawed so hard, I knew what they were going to be experiencing maybe. I had an idea of what they would feel and how the world would treat them. I prepped a ton of slides with all the advice I wish I had at that age. In the end, the kids were all so into it. They asked me a ton of questions, wanted to know everything about my upcoming game, Mimicry. They wanted to follow my itch page, and wanted me to play their games, too.
It was worth it.
I then received an email from the organizers saying that I was inspirational. One
organizer cried, OVER ZOOM! I was asked to present again.
Man, it’s funny huh?
Balance.
The universe needs it.
In order to feel like I’m on top of the world, and like I made a difference in someone’s life, I had to feel as low as possible first. This always happens to me, and I’m sure it happens to you, too. I’m glad those internet trolls told me I’d fail, because by the end of the day, I think I helped more little brown and black kids get stronger. Together, we will raise the biggest middle finger we can by surviving and by creating.
I love making games.
I’ve never stopped and I never will.

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